


Dirthal'or Sal'falon

by Washedawaycloud



Series: Shiva gara Sael [2]
Category: Dragon Age (Video Games), Dragon Age - All Media Types, Dragon Age: Inquisition
Genre: Demons, Dragon Age Lore, Headcanon Lore, Spirits
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-04-17
Updated: 2017-04-17
Packaged: 2018-10-20 00:51:57
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 3
Words: 2,421
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10651572
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Washedawaycloud/pseuds/Washedawaycloud
Summary: The writings of Solas, known as Action, known as Fen'Harel on the state of the Shemlen soul, Soul Partners, the Veil, the Fade and anything else he can think to write.Here be spoilers for Ben Fen'lanen Sildaera Enfenim.





	1. The State of the Human Soul

**Author's Note:**

> Here be lore.  
> Lore from Solas' point of view which - is going to get very spoilery but I **need** to get it down somewhere.

_18 Banal Ena’las 9: 43 Dragon_

_When the human woman, Jayla, when she first came to be in my care, I was fascinated. Angry, but fascinated. This woman doesn’t have the blockage that her compatriots have. Her soul sings brightly in the Fade. She feels with a depth and understanding the rest of her kind do not. She feels with a depth many of the shadowed people no longer do._

_But that is not the point of this writing. The human, Jayla, her soul is pristine. There is no mark upon it. Not as there is for the Shemlen of this time. The quickbloods here all have – a mass. A blockage. Something that stops their magic and dulls their ability to interact with spirits and magic safely. I have been looking into such things._

_The dwarf, Varric, he spoke of a friend, an ‘abomination’. Spirit healer. This Spirit Healer, whom hope took interest in and aided often, also caught the eye of a spirit of Justice. Justice that was locked into a rotting body as the story apparently goes._

_What is interesting, is both these humans do not have the blockage. One can assume the Spirit Healer must, as the spirit partners never properly merged with him. It might be for the best; the Spirit Healer’s story does not have the best of endings. Either way, this Justice that the Spirit Healer ‘played host to’ never degraded like all the others have that attempt to find their spirit partners._

_That is what I have come to know abominations as – failed attempts to find a spirit partners. Many do so out of fear, and invite the first thing they see in. It – is like a disease accompanies the wrong spirit, and the wound to join them together festers. Festers so quickly neither can keep their mind or will and they become a deranged blood thirsty animal._

_How many have we lost to such fumbling?_

_The Herald – human, Jayla, she brought me on her expedition into the Frostback Basin. We learned many things, but what I learned is the ‘savage’ Avvar – they find and keep spirit partners. In much the same way myself and Action coexist, always together and always apart, their children have a spirit guard. Separate together, no festering at the joining sight._

_They later remove the friendly spirit from the child, without losing spirit or child in the process. It is – fascinating. I must go back to that tribe and request an exchange of learning with their Augur. They would not tell Jayla much when she asked after the information. A pity. A mind like hers could make sense of it, perhaps more sense than even I can. She shows a wisdom I have not seen – in ages._

_Her soul calls to love, hope, mercy. They all crowd around her, slide into her and leave her be as they need to. Strength comes to her far more often than I would ever have assumed it would. I brought her to it so it might train her. The intent for it to bond with her in the strange way her bonds form was not part of the plan._

_What most fascinates me about her spirit is it has so many partners. Love – it is a part of her, the most base component of her soul. Hope and Mercy the next strongest facets, but Strength – one would assume after travelling beside her, living with her, that Strength melded with her soul long ago with Love._

_I am not sure what to make of her soul and capabilities. The strength of it means she accesses magic easily, far too easily for this age. It will make her a target in the future. It will put her in danger if I do not keep agents around her to thwart the possibility._

_However, the way her soul is formed, it means there is hope for the people yet. Even if she hales from another world, her soul is whole rather than fragmented and scarred over. The Spirit Healer who hosted Justice gives me hope as well._

_Though his story ended poorly, and I have no idea if he lives or has died, his soul partner found him. Lived in harmony with him. Their ‘corruption’ is – unfortunate. Reversible if I had to take a guess, all corruptions are. Even Void-Blight._

_I ramble on too much. One of the magelings is waking, which means the rest will wake with her, Jayla as well._


	2. History Lessons

_22 Banal Ena’las 9:42 Dragon_

_I realize that if my plan goes as I fear it might, that I must explain much to those who find these journals. The soul is not a simple thing to explain, less simple than the veil and its workings, than magic and its origins. But I shall do my best so when the veil is gone, there will be less panic among the people._

_When the world was young, all were spirits. The Chant, at least, has that much right. It is from these ages of life and learning, seeing the …evolution of the world, that the first of the People came to be. Young spirits desiring a more permanent interaction with an ever changing, mutable world. They were the first of the Elves. Much like the primitive humans, they were a tribal culture. Their dances still echo in the deepest parts of the fade. Their wild magic still shapes Thedas to this day if you know where to look for such things._

_Spirits and people stood side by side for eons. Magic becoming ever more refined and evolving past a simple state of Mana. Mana – our lifeforce, was a small pool in comparison to what the Ancient of Ancients made it into. They did so with the aid of their spirit partner. Sal’Falon. Elgar’Falon depending upon the terminology you most desire to use. These friends were a part of them, integral to their very survival and yet – separate. A spirit, a body, a soul all pressed together, moving like well working machinery. They bred, these first Elves, and they died. Something no self-respecting Elvhen will tell you. But it is true, we were candles once that burned bright and snuffed out when the world became too much._

_**The Forgotten Ones** , **Forbidden Ones** , they were the first demons, the first Gods of the people. Seven once benevolent spirits. **Ishmael** as he is known to those who killed him, Choice, Desire, Curiosity. **Gaxkang** ‘the Unbound’ – Weakness, Doubt – Strength. **Xenbenkeck** – Aspiration, Interest, Desire, Covetous. **Anaris** – Fertility, Propserity – Disease, Famine. **Geldauran** – Happiness, Confidence, Bravery, Terror, Doubt, Antipathy. **Daern’thal** – Loyalty, Trust, Kindness, Spite  & Malevolence. **The Formless One** – neither good nor bad, he was the spirit of change. Never taking a true form as the others did._

_They were the first of the first. Not mortal not permanent but powerful, able to change the world as they saw fit. Those of their kind, embodiments of an aspect but so much more - the first to be spirit soul and person all at once were the Evanuris. They were born when our magic was just beginning to truly become unimaginable, permeating all corners of Thedas._

_**Elgar’nan** – Paternal Instinct, Vengeance, Ruthlessness, Justice, **Mythal** – Maternal Instinct, Love, Justice, Retribution the ‘father and mother of all’ did truly birth the pantheon save three.  From them sprung **Falon’din** child of life and friend of dead, death himself, a guide when he saw fit to be he was life, death, friendship, betrayal. **Dirthamen** , the twin, wisdom, loyalty, secrets and cunning. **Anduril** – adventure, curiosity, gluttony, cruelty. **Sylaise** , love, harmony, tranquility, healing, the heart of the home – she was devastation._

_And then there were the three who were not of the Forgotten ones and not truly Evanuris, whole and hailing from mortal parents. **June** – first of the Durgen’lin or Durgen’len depending upon the era, formed from the earth by Sylaise out of loneliness, titan blood in his heart, eyes the color of Lyrium and the ability to craft wonders. **Ghilan’nain** – Halla Mother, the Navigator – Anduril plucked her from the sky and gave her life. She shone like starlight until her corruption._

_Then, there is me. Solas who is Action who is Pride who was Purpose and is **Fen’Harel**. I am neither a forgotten one nor truly of the Evanuris. I was not made, I was not born of mortals, I was Action and Purpose, living happily at Mythal’s side. She was my greatest friend, my strongest ally once I took flesh. If not for her desire to see me in the world of permanence, I doubt I would still be as I am now. She coaxed me from the skin of spirits and into that of Elves._

_I even took on the form of a child, choosing my parents, determined to learn and be Wisdom. It – did not work out as well as I would have liked. I came to be when Anduril came to be. We grew together, learned together, but ultimately were worlds apart. I had no name until she named me Pride. A joke, a cruelty, a truth. Purpose forgot to become wisdom and thus became Pride who took wolf skin and acted before thinking. And unlike the Evanuris I am not ‘whole’ Solas and Action are bound, but we are not separate, not squished and sewn together. Born together, living together, working together, sometimes more than others. We are not Solas or Action without the other part. It is – difficult to explain. I am the only one of my kind. Not Forgotten, not Evanuris._

_Even Cole is apart from what I am._

_We were not gods, either. Not at first. We were just people, a family that loved and fought together. Always together, even when we fractured, we were together. But the Forgotten ones pushed the people too hard, Elgar’nan and Mythal retaliated to protect the people – and history, carefully hidden history, knows of our rise to power._


	3. Waking

_**22 Sulh’un’or Durlahn 9:39 Dragon, 8438 FA, 9438 EA (Can it truly have been so long?)** _

_I hesitate to write such things down, but am forced to remember that my people, who speak and write as I do, are gone. All of them. A harsh reality to face. How Anduril would laugh at me._

_I have been awake just three months and travelling the place they call Ferelden now. It is distressing to see these people, though I am hesitant to call them such. They are dull, and without depth, as if they were an illustration on a page within a moldering tome. Their dreams are plagued with spirits that twist upon entering them, nightmare and fear demons are plentiful and varied in form, the dreams themselves lead me to call these people Shadows._

_The First Men were more vibrant than these, the first Dwarves had more imagination and cunning. I cannot bring myself to even look upon those who are of my people’s blood. What disease and pestilence has befallen them? They are stunted, smaller than humans when once we towered above them. I have had to learn to lean and hunch to hide my height. Already I have too many questioning my wealth, for even emaciated as I am from Uthenera I am healthier than the shadows._

_The common tongue of humans has greatly changed since last I heard it. It is still brash and blunt, but there is more nuance to it now. Not much, mind you, but enough to denote an evolution of their intellect._

_I have come across memories of great battles, and they make bile roll in my stomach. Void sickness has taken parts of this great world. Corrupted monsters called darkspawn roam the bowels of Thedas, stealing women and children for nefarious purpose or of times food. They are far more corrupted than Anduril became. Far and away more grotesque than what happened to my fellows when they became addicted to Titan’s blood._

_I have so much to write and yet my mind will not allow me to sit and write it all. I have my orb, but cannot unlock it. I am too weak. Just a month ago I came across a man who fairly stunk of the fade and showed him the foci. He also could not unlock it, but gave a valiant try. We met on a boat of all places, one filled with refugees. Mostly magically inclined. I do not call them Mages for they are too weak to be considered such. There are also those poor creatures who have been forcibly cut off from the Fade. Tranquil they call them. They cannot dream, they cannot feel. They are husks who can do the drudgery of their fellows._

_What monsters are these people to do such a thing?_

_There are times, more and more often, where I cannot fathom that this is what the veil has created – what I created. A world where the talented are silenced, where my people are little more than slaves in whatever position they attain. I – had thought to simply live, when I woke, to walk amongst my people and live the rest of my days until I was too tired to stay awake._

_I had thought to wander, to keep my artifacts and retake their power before sharing them with the People. Teach them of the time before Elvhenan. Now it is clear I must use my artifacts, I must take down the veil and somehow, teach these people of their history._

_**30 Sulh’un’or Durlahn 9438 EA** _

_I have met the so called Dalish who claim to hold the history of the People. They are like children taking hold of stories corrupted from ears of not being written down.  They have no written records from prior to the fall. Their records, oral and otherwise, begin around the founding of their ‘new’ homeland in the Dales._

_So much of this horrifies me. That Humans control our landmarks, even ones as pitiable as the Dales and Halam’shiral is enough to make my blood grow cold._

_They want no part of my history. They want no part of my artifacts. I am called flat ear, and they curse me with hopes the Dread Wolf will take me. The Dread Wolf has become a cautionary tale. I am described as Mad, vindictive, a trickster, one who hurt the people more than helped them.  I have thoughts as to where such stories might have started, but I will not think upon it. I will visit the Fade, and go relive memories  of a more pleasant time._

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> Well goddamn, Solas is fucking old. LIke I knew he was old, but Arlathan was founded 8 thousand years ago, and I can only assume it was by the Evanuris when they were at the beginning of their Godhood. And if all of them were young-ish? We're looking at a very old Dread Wolf.


End file.
